Slowpoke

with thanks to lyk_whoa_baby

15: [guest article]

"Oh Kecleon, you were just Game Freak's failed attempt at making a Chameleon type Pokemon. You suck sooooooo much. Seriously you're ability isn't even that useful in the game. I mean you turn into the opponent's type, but since most of the time attacks of the same type are resistant, the opponent could always pick another attack to use and get over it. Seriously, this ability has major downsides. I also think the stripes on its stomach is just a really crappy addition to its type. Another thing is that this is basically Gen 3's Sudowoodo. You couldn't advance until you uncovered the thing and either battled it or captured it."

with again thanks to Fuelbi?

The Bold Font Post

twofer!

with gracias to this train of thought

Haunted

note the birds in the top right of the second panel

with thanks to this guy's page

Drifloon

cenity

Drifloon. The candy wrapper Pokémon. They haunt garbage sites at night, and on come into the light on Valentine's day. No not really. I'm just jerking your chord. Drifloon's actual Pokédex entry, as we will see, is far more obscene.
Aside from the stupid x, the stupid string arms, the stupid heart shaped hands, the stupid concept really, what's the cloud thing on its head? It's beret? Does Drifloon surrender and run when you encounter it in the wild?
Back to the Pokédex thing. According to Bulbapedia: Drifloon usually try to grab children in attempts to bring them to the underworld, but these attempts always end up with the Drifloon getting swung around.


Drifloon is a Tim Burton reject. It's official

#569 Garbodor: Trash Heap Pokémon [guest article]

"I’m not sure what I can say about this literal pile of trash. Garbodor looks like the misshapen bastard child of Domo-kun and Pippi Longstocking, as conceived by Marcel Duchamp. How did it pass whatever quality assurance test Pokémon undergo? And why am I just now asking that question? I know Poison-types and awful design choices are frequent bedfellows, but Garbodor has the important distinction of being both terrible and lazy. I can only imagine the discussion that led to its birth. "We just finished the ice cream cone. What's next?" "How about a bag of trash?" "Brilliant! And it can be Poison-type, because… get it… haha, garbage!""


with thanks to fishdalf

I Just Love Shameless Advertising

Formative Years

The Embarrassment Continues

and will keep continuing here at Double Fudge Chocolate Brownie

Breloom is another character. How tenuous does an idea for a Pokémon have to be to get pushed through for production? Not even this low (which is the revisited tragedy that is this site's mantra). So Breloom is not the low but a low. We'll decide on that low close to the close.
We'll break down Breloom all bullet style

• the sunhat is actually a part of its head
• its collar is actually a part of its throat
• there's this random pink eyeball on the sunhat
• it has little beak hands
• its general form is an embarrassment to the Tyrannosaurs Rex. and the chicken.
• its tail just loses

So, as you can clearly see, a bunch of weak design elements put together make for a weak design. Breloom sucks. Don't catch it.

Reach For the Sky Meatballs!

I bet itd be even funnier if I knew Japanese. thanks to this guy's page

Herdier [guest article]

"Is this just a dog? This is a dog. The people at Pokémon have officially given up. I want like dragons and giant bugs, psychic ducks and POCKET MONSTERS to fight, not common household animals. Making dogs fight makes YOU the monster. Did they include this Pokemon at the request of Michael Vick?"


with thanks to Brendan