Slowpoke

with thanks to lyk_whoa_baby

15: [guest article]

"Oh Kecleon, you were just Game Freak's failed attempt at making a Chameleon type Pokemon. You suck sooooooo much. Seriously you're ability isn't even that useful in the game. I mean you turn into the opponent's type, but since most of the time attacks of the same type are resistant, the opponent could always pick another attack to use and get over it. Seriously, this ability has major downsides. I also think the stripes on its stomach is just a really crappy addition to its type. Another thing is that this is basically Gen 3's Sudowoodo. You couldn't advance until you uncovered the thing and either battled it or captured it."

with again thanks to Fuelbi?

The Bold Font Post

twofer!

with gracias to this train of thought

Haunted

note the birds in the top right of the second panel

with thanks to this guy's page

Drifloon

cenity

Drifloon. The candy wrapper Pokémon. They haunt garbage sites at night, and on come into the light on Valentine's day. No not really. I'm just jerking your chord. Drifloon's actual Pokédex entry, as we will see, is far more obscene.
Aside from the stupid x, the stupid string arms, the stupid heart shaped hands, the stupid concept really, what's the cloud thing on its head? It's beret? Does Drifloon surrender and run when you encounter it in the wild?
Back to the Pokédex thing. According to Bulbapedia: Drifloon usually try to grab children in attempts to bring them to the underworld, but these attempts always end up with the Drifloon getting swung around.


Drifloon is a Tim Burton reject. It's official

#569 Garbodor: Trash Heap Pokémon [guest article]

"I’m not sure what I can say about this literal pile of trash. Garbodor looks like the misshapen bastard child of Domo-kun and Pippi Longstocking, as conceived by Marcel Duchamp. How did it pass whatever quality assurance test Pokémon undergo? And why am I just now asking that question? I know Poison-types and awful design choices are frequent bedfellows, but Garbodor has the important distinction of being both terrible and lazy. I can only imagine the discussion that led to its birth. "We just finished the ice cream cone. What's next?" "How about a bag of trash?" "Brilliant! And it can be Poison-type, because… get it… haha, garbage!""


with thanks to fishdalf

I Just Love Shameless Advertising

Formative Years

The Embarrassment Continues

and will keep continuing here at Double Fudge Chocolate Brownie

Breloom is another character. How tenuous does an idea for a Pokémon have to be to get pushed through for production? Not even this low (which is the revisited tragedy that is this site's mantra). So Breloom is not the low but a low. We'll decide on that low close to the close.
We'll break down Breloom all bullet style

• the sunhat is actually a part of its head
• its collar is actually a part of its throat
• there's this random pink eyeball on the sunhat
• it has little beak hands
• its general form is an embarrassment to the Tyrannosaurs Rex. and the chicken.
• its tail just loses

So, as you can clearly see, a bunch of weak design elements put together make for a weak design. Breloom sucks. Don't catch it.

Reach For the Sky Meatballs!

I bet itd be even funnier if I knew Japanese. thanks to this guy's page

Herdier [guest article]

"Is this just a dog? This is a dog. The people at Pokémon have officially given up. I want like dragons and giant bugs, psychic ducks and POCKET MONSTERS to fight, not common household animals. Making dogs fight makes YOU the monster. Did they include this Pokemon at the request of Michael Vick?"


with thanks to Brendan

Truth III

geekstir

Bass (as in fish)

even sorrier than Magikarp

Uglay. I don't have much commentary on Feebas, he looks like he just realized wet his pants, and is shocked and undignified.

His spots. They look like they take the form of his nostrils, which looks weird (like the flesh was pulled up from his lips), and then those other spots must moonlight as spots (brilliance!). They look like holes in its cranium. Feebas is the nasal passages Pokémon. And it sucks hard.

LOLCHATS

yeah
we have cats now

SOLID

with mucho thanksies to MegBert607

Yeah This Can Happen

with thanks to Psycho-Kelvio?

No. 335: Zangoose [guest article]

"Now, I know what you're thinking."

"'Zangoose? Isn't that the Russian dude from Street Fighter?'

And I'm here to tell you, no, they are not the same. But, you're not the only one to get them confused. MessatsuGouFox of Deviantart also noticed a connection, and he drew the following picture which is, in the words of SupaFuzFurry, and I quote: "Amazingly hot".

So yeah, that exists.



Anyway, Zangoose is trying so hard to be cool, it hurts. He's got the narrowed eyes, the Digimon-esque asymmetry, the "scar" over one eye, hand-claws, and a lightning bolt shaped mark.

I don't think things could get any more Kingdom-Hearts-villain-style-middle-school-conception-of-badass, but WHOOPS, looks like another "Deviant", SkidzMcGee, is here to prove me wrong, with his "latest deviation", "Reaper Zangoose":

Suffice to say this all is making me "viscerally sick".


If he was just pure white, I'd love it. If it was even symmetrical, that would be a step in the right direction. But I have always hated middle schoolers, and I make no exception for the shit they draw on the inside of their Social Studies textbooks."


Overall: 2/10

with thanks a ton to Da Straw Hate Samurai

!!!!!!!!!!!

the these days template

with thanks to Pokémon Comics Dot Net

Baby Wobbuffet

Why Not?

Where do I begin? Well the chode is obvious. Wynaut has a fat limp dick on its head. Just staring at it makes me hate modern Pokémans and consider a more adult life. The baby Pokémon were a bad idea anyway.
"Calling all emoticons, we have a stupid concept for a Pokémon." The emoticons arrive on the scene. They do little to aid the situation. They do their job. We here at Double Fudge Chocolate Brownie have no respect foe emoticons.
And theres the other shit, like the sleeve ear things, the Charlie Brown-esque skirt, and chub legs (its chubbs). Skirts, Chubbs, and Chodes. 
I mean who could look at this Pokémon and want it in their party? So why include it in the games? I don't remember Wobbuffet existing for any reason as well (except to swing out unjust KOs in Melee. man that guy pissed me off). Unown, another pointless Pokémon, makes a brief cameo in the tail.

Technique has a Q in it

with thanks to Buzzfeed

Post #78

support your local community!

sorry for the lacks in updates comrades. been dealing with metal health issues

The Coming of the Bait and Switch

maybe this came from here but I have no idea

This was a triumph

The red marker was done by the teacher.

Yeah. Awesome.

happy new year!